In the past divorce was considered to be a topic that was associated with a moral failure or other significant issue. Over time divorce rates have changed along with the reasons for why people get a divorce. While there are numerous reasons why people choose a divorce, one of more common ones is how you and your spouse communicate.
The key for any healthy relationship is that communication skills remain strong. Often times, couples seek a divorce because they wish to eliminate this aspect of the relationship with their spouse. Contentious communication between partners can be incredibly taxing and hurtful. When a couple gets divorced without children, for the most part their issue is solved. But for those couples who have kids, a divorce does not mean that you avoid your spouse. Communication will still be at the heart of the relationship because the adults will need to make plans together regarding custody, holidays, and many other aspects of the children’s lives.
Additionally, relationships that struggle with communication during marriage will carry that to the divorce. This type of behavior can lead to health concerns in the children who are exposed to this environment. The stress of that type of marriage relationship spills out onto the other members of the family which in turn puts the burden of the relationship on their own shoulders. According to Tamara Afifi, Communications Professor from University of California Santa Barbara, (INSERT LINK) to the degree of the toxicity in the relationship the greater potential health compromise in the child. Children will respond physically as if they are the ones exposed to the harm itself just by being exposed to stressful conversations they hear. There body will release cortisol which tells the body to respond to crisis which puts the body into alert. Prolonged exposure to this heightened state can lead to weight gain, lack of sleep, anxiety and stomach pain due to the stress level in the home environment.
If you are thinking that divorce is a necessary step for you and your spouse consider how you will establish a healthy communication plan going forward. If you have children in your life, you will want to make it a priority to communicate well so your children see a good example of communication. Working hard to demonstrate these skills to your children can pay dividends in the years to come. They can learn that no matter how relationships grow, change or fade they can be strengthened by clear communication.
If you need legal advice to help you in your divorce proceedings you should consider contacting Andrews & Arbenz. We are a law firm in the Puget Sound that focuses on numerous aspects of the law including divorce, custody, assets disbursement and many other elements of a divorce. We have years of experience in helping adults decide if a divorce is an option they should consider and how to make sure they are healthy going through the process. If you need a Gig Harbor attorney then reach out to us today.